Think of pain as a friend. A terrible, toxic friend. Who shows up uninvited, burrows into your life. You can’t ask him for help. You can’t expect him to understand you and your problems. You’re just fundamentally dissimilar. But stuck together, like a buddy cop movie no one asked for.
This friend will take up all your time. He will get jealous if you hang out with your other (non toxic) friends. He will police your hobbies. Tell you to constantly give up your passions under the guise of realism. He will follow you to work. Get you fired. He will speak on your behalf. Leave you friendless. He will create your inner demons and blackmail you with them. He will try to keep you all to himself.
Your confusion is his triumph. Your helplessness, his reason to stay. Your inner and outer humiliation, his only purpose.
The only way he goes away is if you bring a more messed up and manipulative friend into your life. But he always comes back. And you always let him in. He promises to not be as bad as the last time. And you know that it means nothing.
But here’s the thing, while trapping you, he also reminds you to constantly seek freedom. While shooting down your thoughts, he makes you realise how special they are and their need to be catalogued. While limiting your creativity, in rare occasions, he also ends up being your muse.
The pain maybe forever. But so are you.
Submitted by a Lupus fighter. He wants to hide his identity due to personal reasons. We hope one day he is ready to come out of the hiding and accept his issues with a big smile yet keep on making others smile too.
8 thoughts on “Description of Pain by a Lupus fighter.”
Fantastic description of pain. I hope he chooses to step forward, he is an excellent writer and obviously has lots to share. It took me a long time to come out of the shadows and put myself out there ‘to the world’, but I’m so happy I did. The blogging community is amazing!!! Thank you for sharing this, truly excellent. 💕
We hope your words inspire him.. Also, glad to know that you took the step forward. Lots of healing hugs and strength to you 🙂
What a beautifully written, powerful piece on pain. I enjoyed the truth and poetty of it. I hope to read more from him 🙂
Reblogged this on White Padded Room and commented:
I couldn’t help but re-blog this one. Sounds a lot like my chronic illness and the abusive relationship I’m currently in, and can’t seem to see a way out of.
I understand this so much
And I also understand why he wants to keep his identity hidden