Painlessly Yours
Autoimmune conditions, chronic pain conditions, chronic pain india, Hashimoto's disease, invisible illness, Letters, self care

Painlessly Yours – A letter to my self

Dear You,

I know, what you are going through at this moment is terribly unbearable. But I want you to remember that “This pain doesn’t define you.”

You are not this pain. You are not this disease. You are not the helplessness you experience. You are not the sympathy people give you. You are not the judgment people pass on you. You are not this hurt. You are not your tears. You are not this dark pit you find your life in. You are a beautiful soul, complete in itself, free from pain and any other bondage.

“If pain must come, may it come quickly. Because I have a life to live, and I need to live it in the best way possible.” ― Paulo Coelho

Yes, this pain demands attention. It wants to be heard, it screams to be seen and it needs to be felt. Once felt, deeply, it becomes a state of being. And beyond that state is a place where it all ceases to exist.

During the darkest phases of your life, I want you to remember the light of your being. The illuminated hope that you spread through your smile, your thoughts and most importantly by your never-say-die spirit. You are a warrior, never let anyone else tell you otherwise. Every battle need not be won, but it has to be fought nevertheless and with you entire being.

“It’s the same with people who say, ‘Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.’ Even people who say this must realize that the exact opposite is true. What doesn’t kill you maims you, cripples you, leaves you weak, makes you whiny and full of yourself at the same time. The more pain, the more pompous you get. Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you incredibly annoying.”― Rob Sheffield

It’s okay to feel angry. It is okay to be annoyed. It is okay to be upset. It is okay to be cranky. It is okay to cry and break down. It is okay to scream. It is okay to feel disappointed. It is okay to tell life that it is being unfair to you. It is okay to feel your doctors keep lying to you, “It doesn’t get better!”. It is okay to be selfish. It is okay to keep yourself first. It is okay to say NO. It is okay to feel misunderstood. It is okay to feel lost. It is okay to be absurd. It is okay to feel hurt. It is okay to not be okay. But it is NOT okay to give up!

painlessly yours

I know there is no light at the end of the tunnel that you can see at the moment. The whole pathway ahead looks dark, dreary and full of uncertainties. But hold on, this is just another bend in the many bends of life and not the end of the road.  Uncertain it surely is, uncomfortable too and that is when you need to be undeterred. Let the warmth of love you are surrounded with, warm up your insides. Think of all those beautiful people, even though they are just a handful, who love you… despite it all. Remember that life is not fair, it never promised to be. It just promised to be worth it all.

Have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror and noticed the depth of your eyes? Beyond the worry-lines and pain nerves, lies an entirely different world which is blooming with the fragrance of inundated joy. It has promises, dreams, desires, passion and enthusiasm. Don’t let one single flame of agony burn down it all.

Remember “You are your own hero!” You have a hero and you see her every day in the mirror. She tells you how she believes in your strength and that no matter what, quitting is never an option. Sometimes she shows you the dark alleys of your past, not to scare you but to show you how far you have come and how well you have faced all that storms that came your way till now. Every morning when you meet, she smiles on seeing the dreams in your eyes because that’s what she always wanted you to be forever… a dreamer!

“Pain is a pesky part of being human, I’ve learned it feels like a stab wound to the heart, something I wish we could all do without, in our lives here. Pain is a sudden hurt that can’t be escaped. But then I have also learned that because of pain, I can feel the beauty, tenderness, and freedom of healing. Pain feels like a fast stab wound to the heart. But then healing feels like the wind against your face when you are spreading your wings and flying through the air! We may not have wings growing out of our backs, but healing is the closest thing that will give us that wind against our faces.” ― C. JoyBell C.

Let tomorrow be the reason why you smile today.

Healing hugs,

N

1 thought on “Painlessly Yours – A letter to my self”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s